Agnieszka, My Life

For me this is a very sad moment. Agnieszka, my love, my future wife, the extraordinary partner of my life and my true angel, died a few days ago in a terrible accident in the Dominican Republic, where she was working, run over by a truck. It’s been a terrible blow to me and all those who loved her, and I’ve lived moments of absolute anguish. Then an unexplainable serenity has begun coming down on me, right in the middle of darkness, in the thickest blackness. A grace, a gift from the sky, that I’ve interpreted and still interpret as the sign of her enduring spiritual presence beside me. Her wonderful light, her infectious smile, her joy of living, working, traveling, making plans, and then stopping and talking to me, suffering me in my odd writer’s ways, kissing and caressing me with that disarming love in her eyes, that absolute dedication and clarity in her glance, that I’d never found in any other woman, before. She has shone and still shines on my life, as well as on that of the people that have seen her even once, with a ray of enthusiasm, and I’m bringing it with me, and infusing it into my works, my literary activity, that now becomes a vow, a life-mission, an eternal dedication and a tribute to our love, that has made us – in life – one sole person, and that now is still burning in me, with her inspiring and supporting me.

Here I’m translating this wonderful thought dedicated to her by Fabrizio Centofanti on La Poesia e lo Spirito:

“It comes all of a sudden: you interrupt everything, it’s the least you can do, when the news comes of a broken life. You try to figure out how you’d feel in those clothes. Which ones? Those of the desperate fiancé, who’s lost the wife of his dreams, or the torn ones of the young woman run over by a madly running truck? The cut is the same: a world exposed to death at all instants, waiting for a simple caress, a bare sense of sharing. People make fun of me because I conclude every dialogue sending my hugs to them. It’s the wish for a less unacceptable tragedy. My friend, I won’t experience the emptiness that is besieging you: I will fill a corner of it, to make it less cold. The soul is swirling and warming energy. Inevitably, it hugs.”

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